Hats, Ranked By How Much I Enjoy Seeing People Wearing Them

  1. Church Lady, in Church -style hat. Bonus points if the hat is part of a monochrome ensemble, where the hat was clearly decided upon FIRST.
  2. . Extra points if it’s with a suit and tie.
  3. Unironic Stetson, when paired with a belt  that was achieved through some display of testosterone.
  4. Smiling baby in sun hat. (Tied with cranky baby trying to pull sun hat off and throw it out of the stroller.)
  5. Tween or teen in ironic-cute animal, cartoon, or knit cap. Earflaps optional, but appreciated.
  6. Queen Elizabeth II’s hats. All of them. But in particular.
  7. Dude in a porkpie hat who knows it’s faintly ridiculous, but is okay with wearing it anyway. [NB: this set should include all wearers of porkpie hats]
  8. .
  9. Everyone, in p.