Bitchy is NOT the New Black


I get a LOT of link requests. I mean, a LOT. And I do try to look at all of the sites, and I do have a list that I will get around to linking when I have five free minutes to edit that sidebar over there. But do you know who I *won't* be linking to? Any of those bitchy sites that exist just so people can make $1.53 in advertising revenue by dissing celebrities and what they're wearing.

Yeah, yeah, I know I link to , but first, they're ACTUALLY FUNNY, and second, they, in the main, limit their criticism to clothes, shoes, jewelry (and, to a lesser extent, hair)–things the celebrities have (or should have) control over. I don't see them spending the bulk of their time ragging on people's bodies, and they go out of their way to compliment people when they can.

But some of the other sites (which I won't link to here; heaven forbid I send them any traffic) say things like "She's a horse!" or "And would you look at those hips, it's too wide for her age. It's like she gave birth already." WTF?

Some of these "critics" think that celebrities have signed up to be shredded by them. That "it's the price of fame." Yeah, well, who made you the collections agent for fame? Simple kindness towards a fellow human should preclude you from writing >90% of what is said on these sites. Do as you would be done by, and all that.

It's your right as a blogger to be as unfunny, cruel, and mercenary as you like. I can't stop you. But I won't link to you, and I won't read you, and I will hope against hope that you become reality-tv-style famous for just one day so that you can have the dubious pleasure of reading what carping and microhearted folks say about YOU and YOUR BODY on other blogs. Got it?

(Oh, and I'm not trying to imply that Elizabeth Taylor is bitchy — I just wanted a gorgeous celebrity in a perfect dress to grace the page.)

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0 thoughts on “Bitchy is NOT the New Black

  1. If you are into analyzing photographs and believe every photograph has some sort of hidden meaning (pose, gesture, who is standing next to whom, etc.), this is a very interesting photograph. First – why the featured book entitled “Theatre” right behind Liz? Interesting choice. Why not a book about dog breeds or cats or architecture or something. And, the hand gesture just slays me. I’m thinking, “If I were to sit like that, with my arm resting on the seat of the couch like that, would my fingers arrange themselves just like that? That being said – that is one gorgeous dress – any ideas on what it is made of?

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  2. And that is why I come to Dress A Day, and not to those other sites.htwollin The dress looks to me as if it might be a satin, possibly a peau de soie, that has been embroidered. If you wanted to make a dress with a similar feel, you might want to opt for a satin (possibly a peau de soie) with an overlay of Alenon lace -unless you wanted to do all that embroidery yourself.She’s absolutely breathtaking in that picture.

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  3. Amen! I do love to read GFY though – those girls are very funny.What a beautiful photo of ET. I always feel bad for her, born into such a gorgeous body and cursed with poor health. But she sure is lovely to look at, isn’t she?

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  4. I listened to a podcast yesterday of Scientific American’s 60-Second Science that talked about celebrities scoring higher on narcissism screening tests than non-celebrities, with reality show contestents scoring the highest of the celebrity group.Makes me wonder how dissing bloggers would score.

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  5. I love this dress, and Liz looked absolutely fab in her younger days (I feel so bad that “age” is not allowing her to look good in her older years.) 😦 However, maybe it’s just me, but it looks like she has a bruise on her left breast. Is it the light??? I just don’t know. She does have the quite piercing eyes and always a smoldering look!

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  6. I agree GFY is very funny, but they still fall clearly into the bitchy celebrities-deserve-to-be-criticized category. I usually agree with their fashion opinions, but they certainly assert them in a not-so-nice way. And they do critique body types (those that are too thin, most often). So. if you’re gonna ban sites written by women who never quite got over their high-school insecurities, I think GFY should go as well.

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  7. What a thoughtful essay, and a great picture as well. Could it be a snapshot someone took at a party?As to her pose, wonder what is in her right hand that she put behind her back? A cigarette, maybe?I think she has dark tan lines on her body. In one of her bios she said the studio told the wardrobe people to always cover her upper arms which it considered fat. Eventually she got quite a complex about them. I’m glad to see any picture where she is letting them show.

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  8. This is a great post. I think that there is room for fun and thoughtful criticism of clothes (which I think GFY does rather well) without the kind of vulgar, personal nastiness you see on a lot of the celebrity sites.

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  9. Thank you Erin for giving us Elizabeth! I love that halter for a dress….and no one wears it as well as she…..however, I have learned over time and frustration with other styles…that this style can make I(who acheived “c” cup status in my late 30’s and only then after I began shopping in the Women’s (not Misses section))look like I have hooplas. I love my curves. I worked very hard for many years to acheive them.Hooray for this shaped Dress!Boo to those who choose to critique the bodies the Goodesses gave us and YAY! to those who “boy (grrl)cott” this type of writing.

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  10. Thanks for today’s blog, Erin. Couldn’t agree more. I think one of the worst by-products of this type of bad behavior is that it keeps celebrities and non-celebrities from taking more chances with their wardrobe choices. They all play it safe and turn out looking very much alike, because they don’t want to end up the “butt” of someone’s joke, or appear with a black band across their eyes.I have not forgotten after all these years, and I hope I will never forget, what Naomi Watts said at the end of “The Beauty Myth”: think about how much the world would change if each time you saw another woman looking attractive, you complimented her, instead of feeling envious, competitive, etc.

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  11. While I am not one to pretend to be above laughing at a joke made at someone else’s expense (isn’t that the only funny kind?), I have to say I think that your defense of listing the Fug girl’s link while refusing to list other “bitchy” links is a stretch.Case in point, today’s Go Fug Yourself update, El Fugtante. Not only is it bitchy, it borders on racism. And there isn’t even an outfit involved. Just an actress caught mid blink and a husband Heather and Jessica don’t approve of.

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  12. Ohmygosh, I’m so glad to hear someone else say something against The Flame Throwers. I can’t stand Those sites either. Also, all that I can say about the Liz Taylor dress is “wow”.

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  13. Hmmm. Robinson has a point — no dress in the J.Lo fugging today. Although I do think that one’s choice of husband is certainly mockable, and the idea of whatsisface as a vampire is certainly funny. Not sure where the racism or near-racism comes into play, though. I probably wouldn’t be so hard on those other bitchy sites if they made even a pretense of being funny, but they don’t.

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  14. Well said. Let’s hear it for non-bitchy websites (and people!). I love how Liz seems to be pointing at herself, going “Don’t you wish you looked this good.”–Lydia

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  15. I think that the reasoning that you include Go Fug Yourself because it’s funny is absolutely valid.As far as racism goes, perhaps that overstates it. However, I personally find the mocking tone in which the poster uses a hispanic dialect disrespectful on a level that goes beyond making fun of someone’s clothing or bad taste in men. It aims itself an entire culture.

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  16. “Not sure where the racism or near-racism comes into play, though.” “That’s because it doesn’t.” Um, so I’m guessing you aren’t Latino/a so you just don’t get it.You might feel differently if someone blasted you by butchering your language/culture.Funny? Up to you–I’m personally not interested in anything celebrities do. Culturally insensitive? Yes. Back to dresses.

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  17. I don’t read any celebrity blogs; personally, I don’t find celebrities all that interesting. I also don’t understand why anyone does but that’s a different story.Somehow I got a free subscription to a celebrity mag, sorry can’t remember the name. When I have a few minutes I look through it before tossing. I’ve been struck with how much print is devoted to celebrity weight. Some weeks a celeb is too thin, a few weeks later they are to fat. No wonder these people are messed up! It seems that no matter what, this magazine will criticize. All I can say is BORING!

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  18. This picture of Liz is what a beautiful woman should look like. And men agree with me. Given the choice of a girfriend who looks like Liz or Nicole Ricci, men will stampede to Liz any day. But by today’s standards she would be considered too fat. Designers and Hollywood types have gone too far with forcing unnatural thinness on everyone. Take back the real woman’s body and be beautiful for your man, not the fashion industry.

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  19. GORGEOUS photo.I absolutely agree. And another thing about “Go Fug” – they are funny, they often write as if they are rooting for the celeb to make a better choice AND they applaud the celeb who does make a better choice. Oh! and they often make a bit of funof themselves and their on quirks and interests as well. Good for you for having standards – too few people do!As always – love the blog. love the dresses. love what you have to say.

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  20. I totally agree. All of those sites (and there are so many) don’t ever have anything amusing (like the GFY folks) about them. Just mean & uninspired.

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  21. Damn I have to say I’m surprised. You defend the Fug site and then go on to have a post entitled “You don’t have to be pretty”!So what is it? Do you want women to have confidence in themselves or not? The Fug site does NOTHING but slam celebrities. And yes they do get personal and attack people, don’t kid yourself! Trying to cover up insults with humor doesn’t change the mean-spiritedness that is essentially at the heart of their blog. Nasty is still nasty. And what’s even sadder is that they attack women 95% of the time. What, a badly dressed guy isn’t as much fun to insult?How can you expect women to listen to your “Pretty” post after that? Don’t these so called celebrities ALSO have the right to wear what they want without caring about what other people think? So why endorse a bashing blog that fundamentally opposes your argument? Either you believe in what you write or you don’t. It’s like you’re saying,”women of the world, you have the right to be yourselves! Oh except for the ones on GFY, you don’t count!” I’m not trying to start a fight, I do love your dress posts. But I have to point out that there is definitely some hypocrisy going on here.

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  22. Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself. (I am large, I contain multitudes.)I’m not saying you can’t criticize people for what they wear — and I do think GFY is more funny than harsh, but that is certainly subjective, and as I haven’t been a subject of their humor who knows if that would hold up under scrutiny, either — what I’m saying is, all those celebrities can go ahead and tell Go Fug Yourself to, well, go fug themselves. So — it’s not that I’m calling for an end to all criticism of people’s dress; that would be pointless & impossible. What I am, in fact, pointing out is that you don’t have to care what people say about you, nor any *obligation* to respond to their criticism. The criticism is always going to be there; humans are judging creatures. What is important is that we are confident enough in our choices that criticism doesn’t faze us. I won’t say “don’t criticize” — although I prefer to read criticism that makes me laugh, rather than cringe — I say instead that you can just not care.Not to mention the fact that most of the GFY targets, are, in fact, tremendously, overwhelmingly, professionally PRETTY. What they are not, by and large, is STYLISH. There is a disconnect between who they are and what they wear — their clothes are not extensions of themselves (I am not picking on celebrities, this is true of the majority of folks, excluding actually GFY target Bai Ling. She has a fully developed aesthetic, actually.) and having your clothes be REALLY you, pretty or not, is the goal I feel everyone should have.Whew! And all this was before my morning caffeine! Whoa.

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